Thankful

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.
"Pooh!" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure of you."

Quyanaqvaa, thank you so much for all your prayers everybody. God is answering. Gram is still in the hospital, the whole fam is with her, she is having good days and bad days. Docs aren't sure yet what the situation will be. Please continue to lift her to God. I'm up here hanging in there, the fam is keeping me updated several times a day. We appreciate all the kind words, encouragement, and prayers from everyone. Thank you all.

In Quinhagak we have warm summer breezes, yup, breezes gusting up to 80 miles an hour right now. Residual effects from a monsoon in Hawaii and the Aleutians. Strange thing is, this whipping wind is 40 degrees! It is arriving here from the south, warm and balmy. It’s melting all our snow and raining on us! Howling wind is an understatement, its more like a screaming hurricane. It nearly blew me off the road walking to work yesterday. I had to lean the weight of my whole body into the heavy gusts just to stay upright and maintain a straight line homeward, could have windsurfed with a sail. Had to laugh at the thought of the wind suddenly ceasing to blow, I would have immediately fallen over like a bike with the kickstand snapped away. But the battle against the tropical headwinds wasn't entirely a "blow out". The road had transformed into an ideal skating rink and my pak boots lacking snow cleats were not ideal skates, I did one of those futile cartoon river dance numbers just before both feet flew right out from under me, suddenly I was staring up an oddly star filled night sky. After flailing around on my backpack like a turtle whose been flipped on its shell I finally righted myself, but it was a struggle to keep my feet underneath me. So I slipped, slid and was blown back to my own front door. Not sure why but I tried to take Ani for a walk.....Now that was entertaining. Ani, clawing away at the sheet of ice under his paws, wasn't even a match for the elements. He was as much of duck out of water as I had been. We threw in the towel on the whole 'walk' idea and hunkered down at home. The whole house has been trembling for the last 24 hours and I question the Jenga blocks that are posing as a foundation underneath us, though so far so good. There really have been storms like this before which have actually blown houses off of their stilts.

"God, listen to me shout, bend an ear to my prayer. When I'm far from anywhere, down to my last gasp, I call out, "Guide me up High Rock Mountain!" Psalm 61:1-2

A Prayer Request

The greatest healing therapy is friendship and love.
~Hubert H. Humphrey

Hi folks, I'm humbly asking please, for prayers of healing for my Gram. She had a stroke yesterday and is in the hospital back home now. The distance from here to there is taking hold. My family and I sincerely thank you.

"Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray. Is anyone happy? Let him sing songs of praise. Is any one of you sick? He should call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven." James 5:13-15

The Beauty of Bethel

"Well, I think those boys will be fine..." Uncle Hubb to Uncle Garth
"But will you?" Uncle Garth to Uncle Hubb, "You've been busy: terrorizing doctors and nurses, beating up teenagers, chasing after lions..."
~Secondhand L

Finally We Had Liftoff
After 2 days of weather hold I was on my way into Bethel. From the plane we saw 4 herds of caribou running around on the tundra! The pilot flew low over them and tilted the wing so we could get a good view. Felt like I was on Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom! Anyway lots of hunters filled their caribou tags this weekend. And a few others had to be searched and rescued. Ah, well everyone survived.

Gaspeq, Cuspiq, Kaspiq, Traditional Yup'ik Shirt for Women
Anya made me my very own gaspeq! Complete with the Seahawk logo sew on the front. Pretty incredible seeing as it was her very first try at making one. She's a seamstress though. No problem. So while she sewed away, I was busy knitting (picture my nose all scrunched, eyes squinting,focused and tongue curled over my top lip in concentration) this is how I knit lol. It was a wild weekend in Bethel.

My New Favorite Movie
If you ever rent another movie, do yourself a favor and see "SECONDHAND LIONS". Best movie I've seen in forever. While we were biding time in Bethel on yet another 'weather hold'. Yes, status quo, normal Alaskan weather and airport protocol: eagerly arriving at the airport 1/2 hour before our flight (plenty of time in this neck of the woods or tundra, rather) while hopefully trying to will away the snow that was very obviously blowing across the runway to snatch our flight plans. After 2 hours of praying for a break in the clouds with enough time for our little 207 to make a hop for it, we were disappointingly sent away and told to return in the morning, better luck next time. They were however, kind enough to let me leave my bags at the airport. This is a relief because a trip to Bethel always means a return trip hauling 3 times the amount of luggage with which you arrived: get the goods while the goods are able to be gotten, in Bethel. After declining the proposition from our cab driver to what would have no doubt been a lively game of soccer at the armory with some local Albanian/Macedonian futbol enthusiasts we bumbled back into Anya's house, shaking and stomping off the excess snow and decided to veg out watching Secondhand Lions. You'll like it, go rent it. Promise. You'll be a better person for it.

Dark and Early This Morning

Anya and I were up again and headed back to the Bethel International (he, he kidding)... Regional Airport to have another go at catching a flight out to Quinhagak. While we were standing at the ticket counter and as the airport staff was arriving to work, we overheard a delightful conversation between the guy who might have been a psuedo air traffic controller/picker of air planes and maybe a ticket rep or airplane mechanic guy (they were oblivious to our 'within earshot locale').

Mechanic to Plane Picker guy, " To Quinhagak?"
Plane Picker guy to Mechanic, "Ah, let's just send up the junk plane."
Mechanic to Plane Picker, "Why not? Sounds good."

"Yeah, Why not?" I asked myself too. Only for my brain to be bombarded with a flurry of reasons myself had in immediate response...
Taking mental note, a deep breath and calming myself so as to not startle the two professionals engrossed in this very serious conversation being held in my presence. I politely interrupted, clearing my throat and stepping a little closer to the counter near the sign that read "All flights must be paid for before boarding, NO EXCEPTIONS". Our airport is more like a bus terminal. "Excuse me", I said to the Picker and Mechanic, "...I couldn't help but overhear your conversation, um, I'm sorry did you just say, 'send up the junk plane'?" For a moment time stood still as my inquiry registered on their radar so to speak, then together, backs to us and realizing what had just occurred, they slowly, simultaneously turned to face us, plastered with sheepish smiles and offering a host of apologies and reassurances. Evidently the 'junk plane' is referred to as such because it's payload capacity is 300 less pounds than any of the other...ah hem, "non-junk planes". Anya claimed that if we really thought about it, technically, it was a compliment, they were saying we are so light and little. I on the other hand, wasn't so optimistic and needed multiple reminders as to why I was supposed to feel completely comfortable and safe that we were about to be escorted out to and airborne in the 'junk plane'. I cranked up the the calming self talk and awaited the usual beckoning of the pilot, much like a teacher taking roll call. Finally, there he was, clipboard in hand, striding out of the back office like Jethro Beaudin, our carharted 20-something pilot sauntered in sporting a cargo tape patched down jacket that had seen better days, took off his ratty baseball cap, scratched his head, looked around at us (the only 2 people in the airport- yet another indicator that we would be the junk planees) and called out our names for Quinhagak or maybe the green mile. As we fell in line and followed him out the door we couldn't help but notice two other pilots dressed in 3 piece suits, following after us. Anya inquired,"So why aren't they our pilots?" "Oh," they smiled almost apologetically "We're flying to Anchorage." I snickered "Yeah, we got the junk plane pilot." "Hey" Jethro scolded me, he almost sounded insulted but changed his mind and chuckled, "Junk plane, eh?" Thankfully and as usual, my fears proved to be unfounded as it was probably the most pleasant flight I've had. Jethro turned out to be the cutest pilot, we had the calmest winds, fullest moon setting over the frozen tundra lakes behind the passenger wing and slightest sunrise beginning its ascent over the mountains in front of the pilot side wing. I leaned against the window and fell asleep to the hum of the engine while trying not to think about what seemed to me, an excessive amount of weight in boxes of dried potatoes crammed in every possible space behind me, surely more than 300 pounds worth. I slept most of the way. Go figure. Junk plane, huh...

Back to the Movie
The title of that gem of cinema sparked my memory (this doesn't happen all that often so I have to seize the archived dusty file as it drifts by) I blame my parents...neither of them remember anything, sadly I didn't used to sympathize quite so much, but I'm afraid as the years keep ticking by I'm beginning to understand all too well. Don't get me wrong, this genetic trait is both a blessing and a cursing...though there are many things I wish I could retrieve from the files, there are also things I'm all too happy to forget, especially when I remember I forgot them. I had a point here somewhere, lets see if I can find it...Oh yeah, I remember...this an an article that my pastor back in Wisconsin published in our local paper last year or the year before, at any rate I kept it so I wouldn't forget what it reminds me to think about...and well, let's just say the movie we watched, rang a bell....enjoy:)

Lion Chaser Manifesto
My blogger buddy, Mark Batterson, recently created a Manifesto for "Lion Chasers". I found it inspiring and motivating and thus, am passing it on to you:
Quit living as if the purpose of life is to arrive safely at death. Set God-sized goals. Pursue God-ordained passions. Go after a dream that is destined to fail without divine intervention. Keep asking questions. Keep making mistakes. Keep seeking God. Stop pointing out problems and become part of the solution. Stop repeating the past and start creating the future. Stop playing it safe and start taking risks. Expand your horizons. Accumulate experiences. Consider the lilies. Enjoy the journey. Find every excuse you can to celebrate everything you can. Live like today is the first day and last day of your life. Don't let what's wrong with you keep you from worshiping what's right with God. Burn sinful bridges. Blaze a new trail. Criticize by creating. Worry less about what people think and more about what God thinks. Don't try to be who you're not. Be yourself. Laugh at yourself. Quit holding out. Quit holding back. Quit running away. Chase the lion!

"The wicked run away when no one is chasing them, but the godly are as bold as lions."

Proverbs 28:1

Happy Post Thanksgiving

"The very fact that a man is thankful implies someone to be thankful to." John Baillie

Sorry, No Flights out on Thanksgiving or the Next Day
Well, I was all packed up and ready to leap into my chariot for that 40 minute flight into Bethel to give thanks with my compadres there. Alas, fyi to all, no flights on Turkey day. So the feast would be had in Quin:) Talked to my own family back in the Dairy State just as they were about to eat. They put me on speaker phone and gave me the honor of saying grace transcontinentally! What a hoot! From there everyone dug is and the phone was passed around, envisioning what was taking place around the yellow Formica table 3500 miles away in my kitchen I started to really miss my fam. With that Ani and I decided to be thankful for having a warm loving family that we could miss, not only that but we decided to be thankful for having a warm loving family we have right here in Quin. Enjoyed a wonderful thanksgiving at Principal Eric's and Sherry's. It was a spread fit to give any thanksgiving dinner a run for its turkey. It started at 2 pm and people didn't stop cycling through until after 6. It was a joy to visit with everyone. I'm thankful there were no flights out:) Today still no flights out. Too foggy and on 'weather hold' with any luck the air traffic will be up and running tomorrow. Oh, well that's how it goes in rural AK;)

Ginger Bread Cookies



So Wednesday night the girls stopped over and we made ginger bread cookies! Thanks to Mike sending up all necessary tools and the gingerbread mix. Nope it wasn't happening from scratch we had our hands full with just the minimum as you can see. But they turned out and everyone got to take home a tasty treat for their families.



Ski Joring to the School to get Cool Whip
Had to go get Cool Whip from the school refrigerator on T Day.
So I said to my self," Self, you need to bundle up and get walking your parkaed self down to the school for cool whip." I replied to myself, "Self you will get there and back faster if you take the dog." I agreed with myself. It was as I stepped into the skis that it hit me,"Self, you just referred to your dog in the same manner of which one would refer to their car." Interesting shift of what is considered legitimate transportation in my world.


Passing of the Bowls-A Yup'ik Tradition
After the Thanksgiving feast was over 'exchanging of the bowls' began. In the local tradition women fill a normal sized kitchen bowl full of different treats and often times homemade agutaq (eskimo ice cream) then they knock on the doors of neighbors and offer the bowl which is received by exchanging a bowl full of goodies in return. What a fun tradition! Let's start it back home.


The Squatter
We've named him/her "Sandy" from the Little Orphan Annie movie, because that's what he looks like. For the past week each morning when I head to work and Ani gets tied outside in his dog house, out pops the head of 'Sandy', who appears to have rested well, spending a cozy night in Ani's temporarily vacant house. Then one morning much to our surprise not only Sandy, but the 'big black dog' that has been running around lately evading the shooters of loose dogs, climbed out. Ani briefly tried to act territorial growling and barking. Evidently that didn't last long because the next morning Sandy didn't even bother so get out, Ani just happily wiggled his way in relieved to not have to use his own body heat to warm the place up. Apparently Ani now has a part time roommate.

P.S. This is Ani when I vacuum.

Hope Everyone Had a Happy Thanksgiving.

"Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever." Psalm 107:1

Just Another Day in Paradise

"The more it snows (Tiddely pom),
The more it goes (Tiddely pom),
The more it goes (Tiddely pom),
On snowing. And nobody knows (Tiddely pom),
How cold my toes (Tiddely pom),
How cold my toes (Tiddely pom),
Are growing."
~Winnie the Pooh


Morning in Quinhagak, Alaska

Barthelman's to the Rescue
I'm happy to report that thanks to the selfless help from our dynamic duo aka Jim and Steph (featured to the right and left). They arrived from volleyball tournament to my neediness...remember the frozen pipes? So they jumped into action, Jim crawled under the house despite the -20 temp and went to work pulling apart the pipes, and hammering away at the tube of ice. Meanwhile back in the house Steph had pots water boiling and was attacking the problem from above. Within 1/2 hour of their undertaking water was draining and I was back in business. They also shared the secrets of helping it not to happen again;)

Banana Bread and Turkey Day Incoming
This weekend I had some help from one of the kiddos. Together we made our first loaf of banana bread! Thanks Gram for the super recipe. I'll be in Bethel for Thanksgiving with my friend Anya as long as the there's good weather for flying. So HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!!

Small Miracles (besides the banana bread;)

Coffee Anyone
I forgot to tell you about how fun God is. The week before I received the Bunn Coffee pot from my friend Amanda in the mail, a couple other friends had sent 2 packages of gourmet coffee neither one having any idea about the fancy new cafe machina on it's way! God is in the small stuff. It made me laugh and smile.

Warm Toes Warm Nose
The other day Sherry and I went out for a jore with 2 dogs each!!! It was like water skiing but on snow. We were practically airborn. About 1/4 of the way through our journey my toes started to ache with cold, I promise I'm not a wuss, I grew up in the ice box of the nation but I also know when my toes aren't gonna make it ...yeah, it was like -20 (my eye lashes were freezing shut). It was soooo fun I didn't want to turn around, plus Sherry is the amazing mother of a toddler and an infant so I didn't want to cut short her opportunity to do something she enjoys. I whispered out a hopeful prayer knowing full well the circulation in my little piggies has always been less than optimal, as we zoomed across an icy frozen lake, "Please God I need you to warm up my toes! We can't go back yet." It was supernatural for my toes because once they become ice cubes they can't get each other warm again and I'm done for. But that day they miraculously warmed up, toasty as if I was sitting by a fire. Yes, I too wondered if they had just thrown in the towel and succumbed to frost bite. Nope, they were truly warm. God is in the small stuff as much as He is the BIG stuff.

What My Skis Want to Say
Hi, it's us, the skis. You know, it hasn't been all waxing and hot irons for us. Our days of chasing down the finish line were over a few years ago when she decided to start calling us her "rock skis" and splurged for some hoite toite new newfangled Salomons. But well, we've been around, had our day in the snow. She bought us during her first ski team season in 9th grade in the elementary school cafeteria before she could drive, yeah, that long ago, might even have been before the whole stealing of the family car incident...pre driver's license that was...(Rachel Aside: "Okay Skis some things are better left unsaid.") fine, okay, okay, anyway what we mean is we've seen her through a lot: high school races, ice box days races, we even skied her to the cabin one winter, first koretloppet, first birkie, and many after that. Yes, back in the day she spent hours waxing us up in all the right temps. But for last few years that's been left to the newbies, we've been lucky to get a quick courtesy coat pre season. But hey, we're still going, we refuse to be stuck in a corner. Why, just last year her mom learned to skate on us. Then when she decided to move to this tundra, who do you suppose was chosen to come along. Not those lightweight rookies, nope who could trust all that fancy schmancy carbon fiber pilot blinding bells and whistles. She went with what she knew she could count on, what could handle the birkie snow, rocks and dirt in spring or the last few unusually warm winters. Skis that could get the job done no matter the terrain. She opted to bring us. Old faithfuls, the 'rock skis', 16 years of clamping the bindings down and whooshing off through trails. Now you can find us zinging over mounds of tundra chasing sled dogs. It's invigorating, we are being reinvented! You never know when your adventure will take a sharp right and enter totally uncharted territory, be ready to embrace it the journey. At least that's what we'd say if skis could talk...


Angelo's Throw Party
My dear friend Jerilynn had a "throw party" today in celebration of her son shooting his first ptarmigan! Congrats Angelo! Here are some great pics of the festivity in spite of the chilly weather lots of people showed up to join in. That's Jerilynn and her mom throwing all the goodies to an eager crowd of women and children from the village! They have 'specials' at the throw parties, that's where a certain gift is for a specific person so that person's name is called out before the gift is 'thrown'. Like today there were specific glass bowls for elders which were handed out, then to our surprise Jerilynn's mom called out Steph and my names and threw us towels instructing "This is for the Maqii-Steam Bath:)"

















Remember Max, the Grinch's Dog????

He's thinking "Seriously, must we do this?"



"Fine, look at me I'm a Caribou........." (Right)

"When blizzards roar out of the north
and freezing rain crusts the land.
It's God's breath that forms the ice,
it's God's breath that turns lakes and rivers solid."
Job 37:9-10

Stop, Drop and....

"One person can have a profound effect on another. And two people...well, two people can work miracles. They can change a whole town. They can change the world." ~Northern Exposure

Hello from Quin:) At right you are being greeted by Alyssa and I (no, I am not referring to us in the introduction quote, I'm referring to Sherry and Eric keep reading:) modeling the standard attire one must robe oneself in before leaving your house lately. It will be this way until May;) Go figure on one of our coldest days yet, I have to trek back and forth to toilet and feed nearly all dogs in teacher housing at noon. Many teachers are traveling this weekend as both the wrestling and volleyball teams have tournaments abroad. So, the few, the proud of us are left behind to fend for our canine pack. Between all the teachers here we have a whopping 16 dogs! Joyously, I am guardian of 5 this weekend. Brrrrrrrr.

At -30 degrees Fahrenheit their pipes freeze solid clear up through the drains and Alaskans finally think about unpacking their long underwear. Yes, you are looking at ice in the drain in my bathtub. That is currently being remedied by wedging a space heater in the 6 inches of wall where the piping is accessible. Principal Eric rigged this "wrong in so many ways even for Alaskans" set up. Next to the 'fire waiting to happen' in my wall, he strategically placed my fire extinguisher (which had been under my kitchen sink) and left saying "Well, call the fire department if you can't put it out." "Okay." I agree since it is the 'fire department' who just created the fire hazard in my wall. On the upswing it is working, the ice is melting as I type. I have downed a Red Bull and am up on fire watch the duration of the thaw. Welcome to the Real Alaska folks;) It was either the space heater or my hair dryer. Disclaimer: Mother, it is not as bad as I just made it sound, I spiced it up for effect.

Recess at 20 below looks more fun than 20 above in Quinhagak. These sleds were purchased when Jim got the skis for the school last year too.





















Ani on display in the latest fashion at our house. I'm getting addicted to the whole knitting thing. He would like you all to know he is that little kid who was forced to wear the sweater that his grandmother knit him even though it is clear to everyone including himself that "they are all gonna laugh at him". Of course, I don't speak from experience. I love everything my Grams make! Especially my Jr. Prom dress! Thanks Gram. (Pause I need to go make sure I'm not burning my bathroom down.) -Nope, ice is still melting.


Justine to the Rescue! Two days in a row now she has trudged across the tundra that separates her house from mine, pulling her purple plastic sled behind her, just in the nick of time. She has met me on the snowgo side walk. Both days I've been loaded down with boxes from the post office. She cheerily trots up along side,"Need some help?" she asks through her toothless grin with the confidence of knowing she's a sight for my sore arms. "Yes I do!" I exclaim as I happily lighten my load in her sled. Together we tug the load to the house. She has also played an integral part during the overabundance of nightly bathrooming and feeding of teacher dogs. She ambitiously volunteered to be quite literally drug around by Ani as I ran back and forth swapping out dogs and food. Every once in a while as I sprinted in and out of houses I would see her go sliding by on her stomach arms outstretched clinging to the leash yelling "Stop Ani! Help! Wait! No, No I'm Okay! Ahhh!" Ani unhindered, proceeded mushing about with his little hostage in tow. They both enjoyed it so much they had a repeat show tonight. By then she had mustered up the courage to have a go at ski joring for the first time! She is one tough little chica and did really well! Ani was surprisingly patient with his new joree! So proud of both of them!

Above all: you wanna here the most exciting news in Quin? Sherry wrote a grant and won! A grant given out by Jenny's Jones! Yep, that TV talk show host, she has a grant program where people can write in about needs they have for projects that will help their communities. She picks a person she feels will use the money to better their community. They are called Jenny's Heroes, and our Sherry is no exception. She and Principal Eric bring so much positive energy to whatever they are directing their attention. They have been and are such a blessing to me and I absolutely know that goes for the school and community of Quinhagak! Because of her hard work and effort, Quinhagak will be building and maintaining a GREEN HOUSE!!! Jenny Jones is funding it! Sherry was surprised on Thursday by a phone call from the talk show host herself, informing her that she had won! Everyone at school knew. Eric got her to bundle up their 8 month old and 3 year old to make the trek down to the school on some bogus excuse. Upon arrival, which you can see is in true Alaskan style, (not to worry she isn't being attacked by a wolverine that is her 8 month old in the 'original' Baby Bjorn. I wanna be like Sherry when I grow up!) teachers and students alike were eagerly smashed into a classroom anticipating the big surprise! Surprise it was! They handed a 'reluctant to even enter the suspicious crowd' Sherry the telephone to which Jenny Jone's on the other end announced the news! You can check it out for yourself on Jenny Jones' website (maybe even write your own grant).
Jenny's Hero Sherry Marousek/Pederson Quyana Sherry! We appreciate you!

" A good woman is hard to find,

and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve,
and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously
all her life long.
She shops around for the best yarns and cottons,
and enjoys knitting and sewing.
She's like a trading ship that sails to faraway places
and brings back exotic surprises.
She's up before dawn, preparing breakfast
for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it,
then, with money she's put aside, plants a garden.
First thing in the morning, she dresses for work,
rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work,
is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She's skilled in the crafts of home and hearth,
diligent in homemaking.
She's quick to assist anyone in need,
reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn't worry about her family when it snows;
their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear.
She makes her own clothing,
and dresses in colorful linens and silks.
Her husband is greatly respected
when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them,
brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops.
Her clothes are well-made and elegant,
and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.
When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say,
and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,
and keeps them all busy and productive.
Her children respect and bless her;
her husband joins in with words of praise:
"Many women have done wonderful things,
but you've outclassed them all!"
Charm can mislead and beauty soon fades.
The woman to be admired and praised
is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.
Give her everything she deserves!
Festoon her life with praises!"
Proverbs 31:10-30

One For The Blog

"Some days you're the spray, some days you're the bear."
~Ancient Alaskan Proverb

Have you ever lurched 3 feet off your bed as you are falling asleep, you know that feeling of falling or leaping, maybe somewhere in between. Well, I did just that this morning and at a most inopportune time it seems. Don't get me wrong, I'm safe here in Quin but for my own peace of mind and paranoia I keep my bear spray within arms reach while I'm sleeping. Along with my dog... anyway a few nights ago I took the safety feature off my bear spray can, don't ask me why. And thus, this particular episode begins.

So a little before 5 am this morning I do one of those leap/lurch/jump moves in my sleep, vaguely I remember whacking something hard with my arm, sending whatever the object was across the room with a slam but the noise proved not to be enough to disrupt my peacefully slumbers... at that point. Ani's sneezing, however, no wait it was more like gagging, his threats of throwing up were enough to slightly rouse me. I drowsily peered down at him shining the cell phone in his direction to see if I'd be on clean up duty. I didn't see anything but he was heaving, wait no he's hacking, it's more of a...cough, cough, cough, cough, gag and now I join him. I try to suck in air but its choked off and followed immediately by more coughing, snorting and gagging. Now my eyes are watering I'm waking up quicker than I want, to find that I can't inhale without coughing out the attempt. Ani and I are a sight to behold. Now fully awake, confused and choking, I leap out of my warm bed and grab at the door! We both make a break for it, barreling into the hallway gasping for breathable oxygen. And we find it, only until the peppered air dissipates throughout the rest of the house. So for the next 1/2 hour I'm forced to use a fleece blanket to filter the spicy air. Yes, I have successfully maced myself and my dog out of bed with bear spray this fine Alaskan pre-dawn morning. Didn't we prophesy this back in June when the can was first holstered to my hip, up and down those river banks of the Kenai.

To be certain my hypothesis was accurate, I went back to the scene of the spray to investigate. The can, just as I had suspected, was laying upside down on the other side of the room. Yup, the oil was on the nozzle, proof was in the pudding so to speak, when I backhanded the can in my jumping/lurching- fit of sleep it had, in fact, fired. Releasing a poof of capsaicin, the active ingredient, into our otherwise fresh Alaskan air. This Counter Assault Bear Deterrent is 'tough enough to stop grizzlies from attacking humans' and to stop humans from sleeping in. A little ego check from God just in case I was getting a bit too sure of myself. Go ahead, have good laugh at my expense, we did.

"I realize how kind God has been to me, and so I tell each of you not to think you are better than you really are. Use good sense and measure yourself by the amount of faith that God has given you." Romans 12:3